Talking About Divorce With Your Children
During a divorce, many people have difficulty understanding exactly what is happening in the process, what their own conflicting emotions mean and how to handle life from moment to moment. For people with children, the situation can be even more difficult because talking to children about what’s going on between mom and dad is not the easiest thing to do when you’re not sure what to say to anyone about it at all, even yourself.
At Holstrom, Sissung, Marks & Anderson, we help parents in Orange, Riverside and San Bernardino counties to navigate their way through the divorce process and to help their children understand and deal with this reality at the same time. Our lawyers can start using their experience and resources today to help you do the same.
For a free telephone consultation with an attorney — call any of our three Southern California office locations directly or contact us online.
What Works and What Doesn’t …
There is no definitive answer to the question: “How should I talk to my kids about what divorce is and what it means?” The truth is — you know your children best. The one thing we do know from experience is that not explaining divorce to children and not keeping the lines of communication open are two things that don’t work. Having said that, here are a few other things you might want to keep in mind:
- Kids are inquisitive by nature and yours probably know more about what’s going on than you might like to believe. At the same time, kids can easily take just a little information and create huge misconceptions with it. By being open, patient and available to answer questions — you, as a parent, can do a lot to prevent your children from forming the wrong ideas.
- When talking to your children about divorce, try not to use that as an opportunity to disparage your spouse or to use the children as “carrier pigeons” between the two of you. This puts children right where they don’t belong — in the middle of the fight. It also fosters conflicting emotions in the kids and may even result in a diagnosis of parental alienation syndrome. Also, keep in mind that one of the most important child custody factors in your favor will be the capacity for fostering a good relationship with the non-custodial parent.
Overwhelmed by the thought of getting as divorce? Talk to an attorney who can help you manage the process in a way that works for you. Call any one of our office locations directly or contact us online.
Free Telephone Consultations / Major Credit Cards Accepted
Orange County: (714) 408-7290 / (866) 586-8231
Riverside County: (951) 817-7665 / (866) 930-1949
San Bernardino County: (909) 327-2065 / (866) 331-9473
